Cheese Smuggling News

A FRENCHMAN has been jailed for smuggling cheese into Britain.
[...]
He was sentenced to spend 28 days behind bars after the court branded his action "a danger to the food chain".
[...]
A customs spokesman said: "Usually people get fines. But in this case the court regarded 194lb as a very large amount of food."

Edinburgh Evening News, 9 June 2005.

I was reading the Sunday papers yesterday and there was one of those Q&A things with some musician I'd never heard of.

Anyway, one of the questions was "Who do you most admire?" And the answer was: My father - for his drive.

Well, I've just had my drive done, and it's done nothing for my kids' admiration for me. They don't even appreciate that they can now get out of the car without stepping in mud. And they still don't tip.