Wednesday, December 18, 2002

Your free-to-air channels tonight:

The Cloning Channel
Old documentaries copied from other channels. (Formerly UK CheapLoans.)

Clone + 1
Special version of Cloning Channel for people watching with their own clone.

UK Cod
Previously unseen colour war footage from 1975, plus recipes. Nudity: YES. Violence: PARTIAL. Vinegar: SOME.

Random pattern of grey dots. (Analogue only after 2006 or 2008 or 2010.)
Your free-to-air programmes tonight:

7.30 - 8.00 Going for a Thong
A panel of celebrities guess which piece of underwear belongs to which celebrity, and how much it would fetch at auction

8.00 - 8.02 Whose line is it anyway?
A panel of celebrities snort at the week’s news

8.02 - 4.00 Scrapheap Challenge
A panel of producers tries to assemble a programme schedule from a pile of clapped-out celebrities and creaky formats