Big Idea: The Grand Metropolitan Sun Pipe

The sun pipe is the modern version of the skylight. It's basically a tube with a mirrored inside surface. You poke one end through the roof and the other end through a ceiling. The ceiling end has a diffuser on it. As the tube is flexible, you can now bring daylight into an area that has no direct access to the sun.

But the sun pipe people need to think big. We really need one over London. Something a couple of miles wide, moored to (say) the Gherkin, would provide guaranteed, full-spectrum daylight to the City, Docklands and much of the West End. It would of course need to be quite a tall pipe, in order to break through the cloud cover.

I'm not entirely sure what effect the Grand Metropolitan Sun Pipe would have on local weather conditions. I imagine that clouds cosying up to the exterior surface of the pipe might well turn to moisture, creating a near-constant run-off down the structure. This valuable resource could be harvested at the base, or even bottled and sold to gullible tourists.

Is this the great engineering project we're looking for, now that the Channel Tunnel is such a rip-snorting success, our high-speed trains thread the countryside and our new generation of NHS IT systems is revolutionising healthcare? Yes! Obviously.

Truncated Quotes

Those who cannot remember the past are conned.
- George Santa

Truncated Quotes

Nothing succeeds like suck.
- Alexandre Dum

Truncated Quotes

Beauty is in the eye of the bee.
- Plat

Spamoem

up. Maybe
we'll have to shoot it out
with the patrol guards.
However, unconscious
on the sidewalk
and Redrick chased
the other three
for four white bouncing lips
and his green-smeared sweaty cheek.
Then the lightning

Three Tracks From My Fantasy Remix Album

1: John Essential - Flame-Fitted Moth

2: Acrylic Carrier - You Are My Clonus

3: Fixamatosis - How Much Did They Pay You, Steven

Definition of "meme"

Sometimes erroneously attributed to author Richard Dawkins, the word "meme" is actually a simple concatenation of "me-me".

The term is used to describe how ideas are spread on the web largely by people who have very little to say, but crave attention.

The ideas in this blog are a key example.

Valuable Life Lesson

Peter Riotis packed two chickens, beef round and strip loin, ground beef and corned beef hash into his stepchildren's Spiderman and princess book bags.

He grabbed coffee creamer, too, mozzarella and string cheese, American cheese singles, a $2 football and other items -- more than $90 worth of goods. Then the 6-year-old boy and two girls, ages 10 and 12, carried the bags full of food outside.

But, according to Pasco County Sheriff's Office investigators, Riotis and the children weren't shopping at the Save-A-Lot grocery, 12060 U.S. 19, on Friday. Riotis was stealing.
[...]
"When I got caught, I told them, 'See what happens. It's not right to steal,' " Riotis said.

The Tampa Tribune, 23 Oct 2005.

Who needs water or power?

AmericanFlags.com Will Replace Weather-Beaten Flags for Free

HUNTINGTON, N.Y., Oct. 27, 2005 -- In the wake of Hurricane Wilma, AmericanFlags.com announced today that it will immediately begin distributing free American Flags to those whose flags were damaged during this autumn's inclement weather. The U.S. flags to be given away by AmericanFlags.com measure 3 feet by 5 feet and generally retail on the website for $19.99, plus shipping and handling. Up to 100,000 customers will get these flags for free and pay only for shipping and handling. AmericanFlags.com ran a similar giveaway earlier this year to mark July 4th and distributed more than 100,000 free flags nationwide.

"The American Flag is perhaps our greatest symbol of perseverance and an unbreakable spirit of resolve," said AmericanFlags.com President/CEO Jeffrey Reynolds. "As the residents of Florida and other weather-battered areas begin clean-up efforts and retire their tattered flags, we want to make sure that they are replaced with clean, new flags that properly reflect that spirit." AmericanFlags.com is the world's largest retailer of U.S. flags and flagpoles, supplying American-made products to corporations, schools, military bases and consumers worldwide. AmericanFlags.com is owned and operated by Precision Marketing Solutions, Inc., a privately-held corporation based in New York. Visitors can claim their free flags by visiting http://www.americanflags.com/.

Great Moments in Customer Service #94

Us: Hi! How are you?

Floor-layer: We're here, aren't we?

The Authentic Sound of British Protest

To shouts of "take your hands off him" and "it's an absolute disgrace" from the audience, he was lifted by security guards and carried out.

The Guardian, 28 July 2005.

After Odell James Rhodes allegedly fled from a stolen vehicle, police say they found several components used in manufacturing methamphetamine in the car along with a few slices of pizza. "It was a barbecue pizza with Canadian bacon and extra cheese," Officer C. B. Caya of the Johnson Police Department said.

Northwest Arkansas Times, 29 June 2005.

Has anyone done the joke about the fan hitting the Sith? Oh.

Cheese Smuggling News

A FRENCHMAN has been jailed for smuggling cheese into Britain.
[...]
He was sentenced to spend 28 days behind bars after the court branded his action "a danger to the food chain".
[...]
A customs spokesman said: "Usually people get fines. But in this case the court regarded 194lb as a very large amount of food."

Edinburgh Evening News, 9 June 2005.

I was reading the Sunday papers yesterday and there was one of those Q&A things with some musician I'd never heard of.

Anyway, one of the questions was "Who do you most admire?" And the answer was: My father - for his drive.

Well, I've just had my drive done, and it's done nothing for my kids' admiration for me. They don't even appreciate that they can now get out of the car without stepping in mud. And they still don't tip.

New Holiday Destination

Lost Sock Laundry II is opening June 17 in the former Midwest TV Appliance space at 1902 E. Pawnee.

The 8,000-square-foot laundry will have 42 washers, 43 dryers and room for more.

"It'll be spacious, clean and carpeted," Dan Schmidt said.

Wichita Eagle, 28 May 2005.

Someone just called me on my mobile and asked me if I deal in firearms.

Jailed on a sandwich beef

A New Hampshire man has been in jail for the last three weeks after allegedly stealing a roast beef sandwich. '"He said he was on his way back to pay for the sandwich," said [Portsmouth Police Officer Michael] Maloney. ' The sandwich was competitively priced at $3.99.

Portsmouth Herald, 19 May 2005.

Happy Meals for Adults

How come these don't exist? I'd like to be offered a little action figure with my food, to keep me distracted. How about Jack and Miles out of Sideways? Or - and this more likely - John and Jane from Mr & Mrs Smith? I can also imagine Bourne tie-in meals, presented in "Treadstone" themed boxes. I want this much more than I want... salads.

"Shoehorse"!?

RZT: You're a self-proclaimed shoehorse. Who is your favorite shoe designer?

JB [Julien Boutter]: I like Paul May shoes, and all Italian shoes in general.

Row Z Tennis